Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Say, Blog Guy, I’ve been wondering about that guy who’s sort of a living legend in your blog. You know who I mean.
Of course. You’re talking about none other than Eugene “Toilethead” Johnson.
Is it true that there is only the one photo of him, and after that he just vanished?
Yes. I’ve used that single photo eight times in my blog, an all-time record. I have detectives out scouring the world for Eugene. That’s a lot of money down the drain.
Blog Guy, last year you wrote about a business that was putting timers in their toilets, so that the lights would turn off after 10 minutes, even if the employees weren’t finished.
I wondered if anybody else is experimenting with ways to get people to spend less time in the bathroom?
Great news. We have another one of those serious etiquette columns that appear to be aimed at folks who were raised by neanderthals. Early neanderthals, not the more evolved ones.
This particular column tells you how to behave if you are a house guest. If you still need to be told this stuff, then good luck ever getting invited anyplace.
Okay, here’s some interesting news. Turns out soldiers in Mexico have just discovered a huge “marijuana plantation” in the middle of a desert.
Lamar, can I talk to you over here for a minute?
Boy, they’re really knocking back the brews. They’ve been drinking for three hours solid and going through keg after keg. But it’s worth it to keep customers happy.
Lamar, where the heck are you? I told you to meet me at the Motor Show.
I’m here, Boss. I’ll find you in a few minutes. I stopped in the men’s room by the Renault display.
Really? I just went by there and I didn’t see a men’s room.
I’m not surprised, Boss, it turns out in Switzerland they just put the stalls right out in the open. Those crazy Swiss, huh?
Dammit Lamar, you’re hopeless!
What is it this time, Boss?
We’re supposed to be the best event planners in the area, and this is our biggest job yet, doing the 2011 convention for the International Stilts Association.
We’ve got 12,000 people walking around on 10-foot stilts, and what did you come up with for toilet facilities?