Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Hang on, this isn’t Yangon?
Blog Guy, I read that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is visiting Myanmar. That’s amazing! Have you been there?
Not to Myanmar, but I was there when they called it Burma.
Oh. Were you in Yangon?
Yes, but they called it Rangoon then.
But it’s the same city, right, the capital?
Rangoon was the capital when I was there, but now the capital is Naypyitaw.
Welcome to Rock Bottom…
Honestly, I don’t even know why we cover stories like this.
It’s another one of those lists ranking living standards in various cities around the world. Vienna is in the number one position, while Baghdad ranks dead last.
“Honey, the company wants to transfer me, does it matter to you and the kids whether we go to Austria or Iraq? I told them I had no preference…”
“No, sweetie, they both sound very nice. You choose…”
Mind you, Baghdad does have competition for the worst places to live. They don’t give honors like that to just anyplace, and Iraq’s capital got to the bottom by edging out Khartoum, Port-au-Prince, N’Djamena and Bangui.
America is still the best. In europe, everything is old, laws keep it that way, and the cost to survive is way too high for most. There’s a difference between being a good place to live and a good place to visit…
So, you guys here on that Groupon deal?
Blog Guy, wake up! Looks like you fell asleep at your computer.
Oh, yeah, thanks. I was going through the so-called “family photos” of finance ministers from the APEC Summit in Hawaii, and I keep falling asleep.
Can’t you get somebody else to do that?
Who? Who on earth is EVER going to look at these pictures, and yet they are a staple of every single summit. There are so many people, we don’t even bother to name them.
And it isn’t just finance ministers. We have world leaders at the summit, we have SPOUSES of world leaders, all so that 1,000 years from now historians can look at them and say, WTF?
One year, every single leader was naked in a group photo. Nobody noticed.
How about a greasy kebab, Your Majesty?
Blog Guy, I see Britain’s Queen Elizabeth just spent 11 days visiting Australia. That must be a huge logistical undertaking involving thousands of aides, security folks, drivers….
Nothing could be further from the truth. The queen is remarkably self-reliant, and instructed her staff “not to make a fuss over me.”
They gave her some MapQuest printouts and emergency contact numbers, and sent her on her way. Here, in this top photo, you can see her asking directions in Australia.
Wow, good for her! That’s very impressive!
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I say, madam, can you direct me to an institution where I may convert my travellers cheques?
No, Mr.B, I so did NOT educate.
You could have called it education if I actually mentioned the amount of carbon emissions.
But I did not. So there, no teaching, no learning.
This train is bound for glory, this train
Whoa! Did you see that, Clancy? Looked like Pope Benedict on that train that just went by!
Nah, it couldn’t have been, Lamar.That’s an express and the Pope takes the local.
Couldn’t he take the express and change to the local at 72nd Street?
Yeah, I guess that would work. Maybe he’s running late this morning, or he’s got a sales call before he hits the office.
I seen him once on the F Train. Real friendly guy.
@Nosmo, hey I see where you went with that one! Well done! 
Oh so that’s a window and those are real people Pope is waving to in the second pic? Looked like a TV screen to me. Thought he was watching a re-run of Real Worshipers of Vatican City.
When the chips are down, in Wackytown
Say, Blog Guy, I keep reading about those group tours you organize to that place you call Wackytown, the goofiest place on earth.
Right, that’s Krasnoyarsk, in Siberia. Think you’d like to join us on a trip? We’ve got a gambling junket coming up. Why waste your time in Las Vegas when you can go to a Wackytown casino?
Gambling, huh? That sounds like fun, but I also like to keep fit when I’m on vacation.
Then this is the place for you! You can go right from the slopes to the casino without even taking off your ski mask, as you can see here!
Plus, they encourage patrons to take breaks for calisthenics, under the close supervision of personal trainers. Look at these folks doing crunches and sit-ups.
Wait just a bleeping minute. Are you INSANE, Blog Guy? Those are cops arresting gamblers in those pictures. That’s a fricking police RAID!
Tim Burton is the perfect choice to be in charge of the OE Blog musical 
Great mooseum! I’ll be back!
Blog Guy, I need some of your famous travel advice. I love visiting the childhood homes of great people, to see where they got their start.
I’ve been to Mark Twain’s home in Hannibal, Missouri, the house where Louisa May Alcott grew up in Concord, Massachusetts, Reverend Martin Luther King’s birth home, in Atlanta…
Say no more, this is your lucky day. Two words for you: Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Um, I think I’m going to need a few more words than that.
Oh. They’ve just opened a museum dedicated to Arnold’s life, in the house where he was born, in Austria. He was there in person for the opening.
He’s not exactly Louisa May Alcott.
The very dumbest? Wow. Thanks, Rick! Come back often!
Our ten-second in-flight movie will be…
Blog Guy, recently you wrote about a bunch of ambitious homemade inventions around the world. A submarine, a helicopter, stuff like that. Do those things actually work?
You bet they do. Here is that farmer in China testing his homemade flying device yesterday. It’s powered by eight motorcycle engines.
Eight motorcycle engines? Cool! Where did he go in it?
Up. About three feet. He hovered for 10 seconds.
Hovering? That’s kind of pointless, isn’t it?
Who’s to say? He may have tapped into a whole new travel market. Leave your worries behind and come hover with us, high above dogs and cats and short people…
Ramen Museum? My cup runneth over!
Okay, kids, I got the tickets for our big vacation trip today, and you’re gonna love it!
Yay for Daddy! You’re the bestest! Where are we going? Disney World, Universal, Dollywood?
Nope, better than that, kids. This year, it’s the Cup Noodles Museum!
WTF, Daddy? A noodle museum?
Sure, kids! It’s a whole museum celebrating the 40th anniversary of cup noodles, with a “Chicken Ramen Factory,” a giant noodle cup, a golden statue of the company’s founder…
It even has “Cup Noodles Park” and a “virtual fryer,” an interactive attraction “where children can experience the manufacturing process of cup noodles…”
ooooo! Come down to Edin, I am never short of my comfort food… Nothing like a steaming bowl of Maggi when its cold and freezing outside…
What’s better than camping out drunk?
Congratulate me, Blog Guy! I’m going to Oktoberfest this year! It’s a life-long dream come true!
Hey, that sounds nice. Where will you be staying?
I‘m not totally sure, but I’m paying about $80 a night, so I’m guessing it will be very, very swanky. Maybe like a suite or something.
Ah. Yeah, I think I know the place, the ‘Wiesn camp’ at the Horse Stadium.
Pretty posh, huh?
Um, it’s 300 tents, holding four people each. So you drink beer all day long, then you crawl into your tent along with your three roomies and their tubas or whatever.
@Malteser: The haiku party is a the-more-the-merrier kind of affair. Thanks for joining — with a rhyme, no less. Let’s invite a limerick to the party:
It’s that time of year
When people drink lots of beer
And when you’re really spent
You can sleep in a tent
And emerge when your head is more clear
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Resident Oddly Enough blog Expert
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Marines on an Air Force Base??? NEVER!