Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Check the clavicles on that babe!

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Fashion staff, this new push-up product of ours is going to turn the beauty business upside down!

Look at this pathetic Victoria’s Secret model showing off their push-up bra. Who needs that? Bosoms are SO last year. Just ask any guy.

Which is where our product comes in. Get ready for the age of the CLAVICLE! That’s right, collar bones ARE the new breasts!

See the hot model in the photo below? See how sensuous her clavicles look when they’re pushed up by our new miracle garment?

Miracle bras: hooters and shooters?

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You may have seen that story about a Detroit woman whose bra  deflected a bullet shot at her as she witnessed a burglary, saving her from more serious injury.

Every guy of a certain age will immediately think of Wonder Woman. I know, it was really BRACELETS that protected Wonder Woman from bullets, but guys looked at that red and gold bra on Lynda Carter and KNEW it did something miraculous.

Hot on the Web in Feb…

It’s March already, so it’s time to head over to the OBB (Off-Blog Betting) parlor and collect your winnings if you correctly guessed my blog’s five most popular posts for February.

Two of them were about Barack Obama and the others were about stupid stuff, so I’m illustrating it with a Victoria’s Secret shot for no apparent reason. You’ll thank me later.

These Flagships hurt my feet!

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Blog Guy, I don’t know what to get my girlfriend for Christmas. Any suggestions?

Sure. How about buying her a Flagship?

A what?

Well, I just saw some photos that said Victoria’s Secret opened a new “Flagship store.” Judging from this picture, I gather a Flagship is a large pair of scissors.

And November’s top blog posts were…

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Blog Guy, give us the list of the most popular items in your blog for November. A lot of us continue to wager on this stuff, and all my Christmas money is riding on this!

Okay, if  you were smart enough to figure out that Barack Obama was a pretty big story in November, you’re halfway there.

Supermodels the size of ants!

Blog Guy, I heard there was a Victoria’s Secret fashion show on Saturday. Do you have a lot of pictures from it? Please, Please?

Not a lot, just 80 or so… Here are some of them. Just click on the little ones to make them bigger.

Anchors Away, lingerie!

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Congratulate me, Blog Guy!

Why?

I enlisted in the Navy!

Awesome. Which one?

There’s more than one?

Sure. There’s the regular U.S. Navy, and then there’s the Victoria’s Secret Navy.They’re both recruiting now.

And the difference? I’m afraid to ask.

Well, you know about the regular navy. Ships, planes, attacks, torpedoes, surface-to-air missiles…  But in the OTHER navy, you mostly ride around on yachts filled with Victoria’s Secret lingerie supermodels, taking them to different places in the Caribbean, opening champagne, slathering tanning oil on them, stuff like that.

You love me in red, Fred?

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“Honey, should I wear my red dress tonight, or my…”

“Yes…”

There you have it. An actual conversation that proves men like red stuff on women. And yet, Reuters reports on a new study that spent $40 million to see if red was more of a turn-on for men than, say, dark brown.

That figure is just a rough guess, you understand, since I have no idea what it really cost.

I see England, I see France…

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underwear-brazil-200.jpgThis is National Underwear Day. I know what you’re saying, “But Bob, I thought that was back in February!”

No, that event, which we covered, was Brazilian National Underwear Day, which is on a different day because they’re in the Southern Hemisphere or something, and also because they have a different word for underwear.

Your face is familiar…stay away from me!

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Blog Guy, I enjoy your strange blog very much. Is there any way I can find others who like it as well?

You mean so you can become friends with them?

Well, no, I was more thinking so I can avoid them if I see them on the street. Maybe get some temporary restraining orders.