Blog Guy,

My boyfriend says the hottest new thing is zombie comedy clubs. Is this true?

Yes. Just because they’re zombies doesn’t mean they don’t want to be entertained. Indeed, modern zombies make up the largest single demographic for reality TV shows.

If you decide to go to a zombie club, some things to remember:

• If you see people lurching, don’t say “Geez, are THEY hammered!” They probably aren’t.
• Don’t make smalltalk about sucking blood. That’s a whole different group of creeps.
• Zombie humor can be tedious. The punchline to every joke is “And then I ate their brains!”
• Whatever you do, DON’T order the house chili!

More posts about Zombies

Members of laughter clubs participate in rally to commemorate  “World Laughter Day” in Chandigarh, India, May 4, 2008.  REUTERS/Ajay Verma

More stuff from Oddly Enough

I’m a little hazy on what is going on. These are waiters in training, but what’s the deal? The only thing you’re allowed to order at this new karaoke bar is four beers?

“Hey, Biff! I’m alone tonight, but I guess I’ll need four brewskies, anyway!”

“I’m the designated driver. Can’t you sneak me a Perrier? I know rules is rules, but…”

“Yo, Tony! Just bring me whatever you recommend! That would be four beers, huh?”

“Are you insane? I’ve just heard 56 guys do bad karaoke renditions of “Country Roads!” I’m gonna need something a whole lot stronger than this!”

Waiter, bring me a slideshow!

Waiters working for a newly-opened karaoke bar receive training at the stadium square in Yiwu, Zhejiang province China, March 6, 2008. REUTERS/ Aly Song

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Memo to Fashion Show Staff: We’ve hit rock bottom now. This was the worst show ever!

Folks, what is RULE NUMBER ONE for fashion shows? No Zombies! So you not only hire zombie models, you even dress them in festive outfits and send them out! Oh, I’m sure nobody noticed, until that one lurched insanely toward the Vogue editor!

This train wreck gets worse. You mistakenly use the hair styling guide from that country music show, and suddenly it’s Paris in the Ozarks! Those models had to crawl down the runway because they couldn’t walk with such heavy hair! Why does this never happen to Lagerfeld?

Models presents creations as part of British designer John Galliano’s Fall/Winter 2008/09 women’s ready-to-wear show for French fashion house Dior in Paris February 25, 2008. REUTERS/Benoit Tessier

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Well, this study may pretty much changes everything. Strength is weakness, Brussels sprouts are chocolate… A poll of young hospital patients found that every one of them rejected the use of clowns as part of the decor, and even the teenagers in the study found clowns to be scary.

“We found that clowns are universally disliked by children,” one researcher said.

Yikes! However, it also turned out that all the children were perfectly okay with hollow-eyed zombies creeping around under their beds at night, half-eaten brains and blood dripping from their foul luminescent fangs. Who knew? Here’s the story:

A carnival reveler dressed as a clown celebrates on the street in Berlin February 18, 2007. REUTERS/Pawel Kopczynski

More stuff from the Oddly Enough Blog

There is nothing I can add to this one to make it stranger than it already is. Turns out, there has been such a sharp increase in naked sleepwalking recently that a hotel group is actually training its staff to deal with late-night nudity.

The hotel people say sleepwalking rose seven-fold in the past year, which must mean you can’t walk down the hall for ice without thinking you’re in a Spencer Tunick photograph. An increase as dramatic as that sounds more like zombies than sleepwalkers.

Hotel staffers are being told to keep towels ready at the front desk for these incidents, so I guess tasers aren’t widely available yet. Here’s the weirdest part: our story says sleepwalking may be brought on by eating cheese. I am not making this up. “You put down that gouda, Lonnie, it’s after eight o’clock!” Read all about it.

More Oddly Enough Blog

Dairy products are displayed at a market in Santa Monica, California October 3, 2007. REUTERS/Lucy Nicholson

I’m afraid we’re going to have to award these guys the “Worst Organizers in the History of Earth” award.

See, it was an attempt to break the world’s record for the biggest zombie lurch, which apparently would have required about 900 of the living dead. But the scant 40 who actually showed up were, well, left in the lurch.

Heck, that number would barely make for a good backyard brains barbecue, much less a world record! Listen up, organizers: if you can’t even get the undead to do what you want, it’s going to be a dismal eternity for you. Meanwhile, though, it’s an enjoyable slideshow:

More Oddly Enough Blog

A man made up to look like a zombie takes part in a bid to break the world record for the “biggest zombie lurch” in Sydney, Australia, September 22, 2007.
REUTERS/Mick Tsikas

Angry patrons of a trendy hair salon assemble behind a police chain to protest. They complain that no matter what they asked for, they left the salon with their hair standing straight up - the salon owners signature hair style, called My God, Ive Just Seen a Zombie!. He achieves this by applying a pound of lard to their hair, and then drying it with a leaf blower.

Oh, wait! Maybe thats not what is happening here at all! Please offer your own explanations, via Post a Comment:

White House guests wait as Marine One lands on the South Lawn of the White House, to take President Bush to Camp David, July 27, 2007. REUTERS/Molly Riley

Dear Blog Guy,
I’m one of the undead, and it doesn’t seem like anybody cares about us when it comes to fashion. We deserve some attention, too. As Shakespeare said, “If you prick us, do we not bleed?” Well, okay, forget I asked that.
Zombie Chick

Well, Zombie Chick, this could be your lucky day - and when is the last time somebody said that to you? Take a look at this model at Moscow Fashion Week. You may be undead, but you’re not unfashionable!

Oddly Enough Blog

A model presents a creation by Fashion House Sado during Fashion Week in Moscow March 29, 2007. REUTERS/Oksana Yushko

You might think this could be any typical car on the New York City subway, but you’d be dead wrong.

In fact, this guy is celebrating Zombie Pride Day, in Madrid. That’s right, Zombie Pride. We’re tired of the living getting all the breaks, and it’s time for the undead to get a little past-due recognition. 

The zombies gathered to pay tribute to George A. Romero, director of the horror film classic Night of the Living Dead.

A subway passenger looks at a man dressed as a Zombie in Madrid February 3, 2007. Men and women from all over Spain gathered in Madrid to celebrate “Zombie Pride Day.” REUTERS/Susana Vera

On Saturday evening some friends stopped by to show off their Halloween costumes. He was going as the late “Crockodile Hunter,” Steve Irwin, and she was going as the stingray that killed him.  ”Crikey” was the only word he would utter.

Dressing as a popular outdoorsman who died just a couple of months ago might have shocked me a bit, except I already knew my own college student son was dressing as a zombie version of the same guy. It turns out, lots and lots of people had the same idea this Halloween, and you can find Steve Irwin costumes all over the place.

Is it too soon for this kind of behavior? Check out the Salt Lake City Tribune’s story on the subject, and drop us your opinions via Post a Comment:                                                        

Australian adventurer Steve Irwin pretends being choked by an albino Burmese  python as he poses with his wife Terri in a 2002 photo. REUTERS/Jim Ruymen