Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

The last huzzah?

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So this is the end. The last post for this blog.

It’s a good thing we’ve said our farewells, because this is also the last day for new comments.

Today, this site freezes in time. You can always revisit it for a little nostalgia, like that old amusement park in the creepy part of town, with all the chains and cobwebs.

Former presidential candidate Herman Cain was fond of telling his supporters, “Stupid people are ruining America!”

Well, maybe that’s true, Herman, but stupid people also provide cheap entertainment, which is a useful service. We should thank them for it, without using any big words.

Yule laugh, yule cry…

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Blog Guy, what do you think is the biggest holiday for your blog?

Christmas, for sure. We celebrate it for most of the year. Not only that, we’re able to appreciate BOTH holidays.

You mean the religious Christmas and commercial Christmas?

No, I mean the magical goosebump childhood excitement Christmas, and the darkly absurd, “Look, somebody shot at Santa’s helicopter!” Christmas.

Your favorite posts of all time…

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I mentioned a few days ago that this blog is going away soon, so it seems appropriate to take a look back at what readers clicked on the most.

I must say, this list of the top 10 posts for the past five years surprised me. But I can’t argue with our official traffic statistics, these little nicks by the snack room vending machine were definitely made by Lamar.

Sorry, you’re not my type…

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Hey Blog Guy, it’s me!

Who?

Me! The guy who talks to you in italics so you can carry on pretend conversations in your blog everyday.

You really EXIST? I always thought those conversations were just voices in my head.

When party smalltalk gets out of control

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Blog Guy, I have a very specific fashion need and I hope you can help with it.

I go to a lot of very fancy affairs, but I have a tendency to say nasty things, and then other guests throw punches at me. What can I wear to protect myself at the holiday parties coming up?

Excuse me. Back up just a minute. You become SO offensive that upscale guests at festive Christmas parties want to punch you out? Is that what you’re saying?

A post-Thanksgiving image booster

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Blog Guy, I’m afraid I really pigged out yesterday at Thanksgiving, but I understand a few extra pounds are considered attractive these days.

Can you please find recent photos of some of the beautiful people who have let themselves go, so your readers can feel better about themselves after Turkey Day?

The worst fashions? Manure couture…

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Blog Guy, I mainly come here for your coverage of really bad fashion. You do show us ALL the worst creations, right?

Of course I do. Except the stuff I need to protect my readers from, of course. But everything else gets…

Hey, I never said I’m proud of myself!

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Blog Guy, I’ve just started a new blog, and I could use some advice from a veteran like yourself. What do you do if you want to get a lot of traffic, but you don’t want to work very hard for it?

That’s called cheap pandering to readers with click-bait, and blogging professionals don’t do it.

Remember to bring protection, honey

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Blog Guy, I’m worried sick! I heard there was some problem with protecting Paris Hilton. Is she okay?

She’s fine, but her bodyguards aren’t.

They were hurt while protecting her?

No, they were fired FOR protecting her. Our story, Elite Polish cops sacked for protecting Paris Hilton, says three police commandos were told to resign or they would be fired for serving as Hilton’s bodyguards during a recent appearance at a shopping mall opening.

Think she’ll notice if we take her purse?

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Lamar, where did you get the models for today’s fashion show?

From my psychiatrist. They’re all in therapy for various things, so they’re happy to have the work.

Therapy? Is it safe to have them here?

Oh sure, Boss, most of the ones with violent tendencies turned down the gig. My shrink says one of these chicks is being treated for narcolepsy.