I must admit to being disappointed but not really surprised that Scarlett Johansson has not yet accepted my offer of weekend shifts shooting soccer.  The year draws swiftly to a close and it would have been better if she had cut her teeth in the clear golden light of Autumn afternoons rather than in these dark Winter days. I’d like to think she’d enjoy coming to terms with the offside-rule; the cosy atmosphere of the wireroom and the witty banter of her colleagues. Who knows in time she might even begin to understand what some of them were saying. 

But cold, dark weather is nothing new to her, Ms Johansson is a New York city native so reasons for her reluctance must be sought elsewhere. She is no doubt mindful of the stiff competition she would face from the breed of dedicated soccer shooters who occupy the touchlines of the Premier League; the years it takes to establish a spot on the pitch at the edge of the penalty box as your own; the weight of the equipment compared to her Lumix demanding use of both hands and the fact that English soccer matches can be played not only on weekend afternoons but also on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings for much of the year.

But who knows where it could lead? A staff job even! 

I could end up with a talented young shooter with an A-list entree into the world of celebrity and fashion with the prospect of an annual performance review you could sell tickets for. Her bad back, chilblains and dependence on food served in styrofoam would be but a small price to pay for job satisfaction and the expectation of an assured place following the national squad at the European Soccer Championships and the World Cup Finals.

Of course, that explains it! I was forgetting that this is English soccer - there are no expectations of covering the national team in a major tournament, silly me. Now I understand why the phone doesn’t ring.

Mind you there is, as you can see,  mounting evidence of moonlighting by others in the public eye,

but just like Scarlett there is no sign so far from either Sienna or Fidel that they are ready to make that leap of faith and give up the day job.